In this
visionary memoir, based on a groundbreaking New York Times Magazine story,
award-winning journalist Katy Butler ponders her parents’ desires for “Good
Deaths” and the forces within medicine that stood in the way.
Katy
Butler was living thousands of miles from her vigorous and self-reliant parents
when the call came: a crippling stroke had left her proud seventy-nine-year-old
father unable to fasten a belt or complete a sentence. Tragedy at first drew
the family closer: her mother devoted herself to caregiving, and Butler joined
the twenty-four million Americans helping shepherd parents through their final
declines.
Then
doctors outfitted her father with a pacemaker, keeping his heart going but
doing nothing to prevent his six-year slide into dementia, near-blindness, and
misery. When he told his exhausted wife, “I’m living too long,” mother and
daughter were forced to confront a series of wrenching moral questions. When
does death stop being a curse and become a blessing? Where is the line between
saving a life and prolonging a dying? When do you say to a doctor, “Let my
loved one go?”
When
doctors refused to disable the pacemaker, condemning her father to a prolonged
and agonizing death, Butler set out to understand why. Her quest had barely
begun when her mother took another path. Faced with her own grave illness, she
rebelled against her doctors, refused open-heart surgery, and met death
head-on.
With a
reporter’s skill and a daughter’s love, Butler explores what happens when our
terror of death collides with the technological imperatives of medicine. Her
provocative thesis is that modern medicine, in its pursuit of maximum
longevity, often creates more suffering than it prevents.
This
revolutionary blend of memoir and investigative reporting lays bare the tangled
web of technology, medicine, and commerce that dying has become. And it
chronicles the rise of Slow Medicine, a new movement trying to reclaim the
“Good Deaths” our ancestors prized.
Knocking
on Heaven’s Door is a map through the labyrinth of a broken medical system. It
will inspire the difficult conversations we need to have with loved ones as it
illuminates the path to a better way of death.
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